Divorce is popular — too popular. It's like your favorite local band ruined by fame: Once the masses first got their hands on the no-fault divorce in 1970s America, they abused it. Now, thanks to them, it's primed for a major backlash. This backlash doesn't mean the public has developed a distaste for the divorce-related details of others — not on your life. But there are some universal details that are often overlooked, until now.
These traits may surprise you and teach you a few things about how to keep your marriage together.
Though their reasons for divorcing may vary, men whose marriages fell apart are fairly similar beyond having ex-wives and legal bills thatll keep their attorneys in silk ties for decades. Here, the traits many formerly married guys share even before their relationships end with expert advice to prevent your husband from joining their club.
1. Theyre shocked.
Thats because about 70% of the time, its the wife who files for divorce. Women tell me, Ive been warning him for years. The husband responds, But I didnt know she was serious! says Michelle Crosby, a family attorney in San Francisco and co-founder of Wevorce, a company dedicated to amicable divorces.
Lesson: Air grievances before they fester, suggests Kimberly Friedmutter, a life-management coach in Malibu, CA and be specific. Instead of saying, You always embarrass me! explain, …
Family status for divorcees is another indication of the burden that disproportionately falls on women. The percentage of men who live with their own children is relatively equal to the percentage of divorced men who live with their children, roughly 25%. For women, the percentage jumps from 30% of all women live with their children to 52% of all women reporting a divorce living with their own children. This suggests that divorce affects women with children to a greater extent than it does men as women are left caring for the children alone.